Ever listen to yourself talk? If so, you’ve probably noticed the negative bias in the language you choose. By using phrases like “I have to…” or “I need to…” we are adding a weight and heaviness to our lives without even realising we’re doing it. Not to mention the sneaky punk “I am…” which pigeonholes us into a particular (usually negative) emotional experience.
The good news? It’s just a habit and it can be easily changed. I’ve put together a list of simple swaps you can make to instantly upgrade your experience of life. Not only will they make you feel better instantly, but when you make it a habit, you'll create a cumulative effect that will upgrade your life.
Give these swaps a go for more gratitude, spaciousness and buoyancy:
1. Have To / Get To
For example: You could say “I have to exercise this morning.” Or upgrade that to “I get to exercise this morning.” This tiny swap shifts us into gratitude and reorients us to the absolute privilege it is to even be able to move our body. It makes the whole idea inviting and light, rather than a heavy obligatory burden. What a gift, yo!
2. Need To / Want To
For example: “I need to write this article today.” Or upgrade that to “I want to write this article today.” This swap shifts us into motivation and creates positive momentum by realigning us with the power of our desire. Letting our desires lead us is a lot easier than dragging an obligation along behind us like a dead body.
3. I Am / I Feel
For example: “I am sad” gets an attitude adjustment just by swapping it up for “I feel sad.” This swap differentiates “me” from “the way I am feeling” which reminds us that we are not our feelings, we are that which experiences our feelings. And we are free to choose a different feeling anytime.
Anytime you notice yourself defaulting to "have to," "need to," or boxing yourself in with "I am", simply make the swap. Upgrade your words and you will instantly upgrade your vibe. It’s a small, but powerful tool to add to your kit. WORD UP!
P.S. Prefer to have me talk you through this? You're in luck. Head here to watch a five minute video.