In the frenzy of the coronavirus, I'd gotten sloppy. Between being inundated with news and information and trying to work from home and home school at the same time and keep up on friendships, I spiraled into some old habits like multitasking and scattered attention. And it was making me bloody miserable.
There is (at last!) a little crack of light shining through the overwhelm and frustration that's been hanging around. And the parting of the clouds is happening not because of some groovy astrological shift, but rather because I made myself accountable. I took responsibility for my own experience.
As Elizabeth Gilbert so aptly observed, “I’ve never seen any life transformation that didn’t begin with the person in question finally getting tired of their own bullshit.”
And do you know what's on the other side of taking responsibility for your bullshit? Agency. Ownership over your life.
As a little girl, my first memorable phrase (which has become sort of a maxim for my life I guess) was "you're not the boss of me. I'm the boss of me."
I stand by those words, not just when I want to have cake for breakfast, but also when it's time to hold myself accountable. I'm in charge of my vibe. I'm the boss of me. No one else is responsible for my bad habits or sloppy self-care.
Now - let's be clear, self-care isn't just things like meditation, facials, and exercise. It's also having really good mental hygiene and discipline around your inputs.
Self-care is having boundaries around technology (ahem...checking your email 5,000 times a day, scrolling the 'gram while you pee, looking at the news first thing in the morning, any of that sound familiar? Yeah. That shit is sloppy.)
Moral of the story: when we get tired of our own bullshit, when we take responsibility and really own our bullshit, we are recognizing that the bullshit is a choice. And that we can make other choices.
Most of us know the things that work well for us. The habits and rituals that help us shine. It's just a matter of coming home to them. Of recommitting to the relationship between ourselves and the things that serve us, not the things that tear us down.
If you can relate, if you've slipped or spiraled, consider this your invitation. Start today. Recommit to your highest self.
Recommit to drawing some boundaries around the things that f*ck with your focus, knock you out of alignment, or make you feel cramped, sad, frustrated or overwhelmed.
Recommit to the things that make you feel good - the habits and rituals that make you feel spacious, focused, and aligned with what matters most to you and how you want to show up in the world.
Because ultimately, you are the boss of you. So give yourself some marching orders that will make you shine, not shrink. Give us the best of you, not the bullshit.
'Cause you're the boss, boo.
P.S. If you're looking to kick off some fresh feels, I've got some suggestions. Take a peak at this little Clarity Cleanse which has simple suggestions on ways you can create more clarity for yourself by making three small changes for 7 days. This blog post Do less and achieve more explores the traps of multitasking and the way back to singular focus. And if you're wanting to take back control of your vibe, set the tone for your day, and return to a sense of purpose and intentionality in your life, pick up your free copy of my Morning Ritual here . xx